It’s Not About You

James 4:1-12

Have you ever found yourself disappointed after opening a present from someone because it’s not what you thought or wanted it to be? Or maybe you got frustrated once because someone didn’t respond to you the way you thought they would. I got annoyed once because God didn’t do what I thought made perfect sense. I remember witnessing to a kid in jr high who was popular and seemed like a great “get” for God, but he didn’t respond. That wasn’t God’s plan at that time, but it didn’t make sense to me.

We can often get frustrated and dismayed when things don’t go the way we expected them to or when it seems like God isn’t answering our prayers favorably. It’s easy to get upset, dwell on the problems and even begin to seek relief or a break from the difficulties. The Jewish Christians did this too while on the run from Paul in the Dispersion. Things were clearly not going their way and the frustrations started mounting. The reality is that the problem is not with others, but instead lies within ourselves.

Noticing the Symptoms

Have you ever been in a yard argument? Things like petty attacks on each other’s yards because flowers crept over a property line, or the yard was mowed too short and the grass got burnt. It seems that no matter what you do or try, the problem only gets worse. The problem is that those frustrations don’t rinse off your back like water on a duck. We all know those shouldn’t be big deals, but they stick with us. One person hurts another, which leads to reciprocation and escalation. Pretty soon we become the live action version of Wile E. Coyote. And just like him, it all comes back on us. And we know this! Don’t we? James is saying this exact thing here at the beginning of the passage. We know not to hold on to things like that, but we do and then we seem to keep falling so easily into that trap. How…why do we keep falling into that same trap?

Discovering the Root Cause

I think the answer to that question is because we’re focused on the wrong thing. Wile E. Coyote runs into the wall because he’s looking in the wrong place – he should be looking at the road ahead, but is usually only staring at his feet. It’s kind of like this video.

I’ve seen this video a few times now, and as I ponder it, the more I wonder what her problem really is. She is focused on how she feels. That’s not bad itself, but eventually she needs to get to the root cause of her problem – the nail. As James continues on in v5, he shows that the issues we think we have are not the issues we actually have. Our problem, just like the lady in the video, is we are too focused on ourselves. This is a problem of SELF-FOCUS. Pride, shown in v6, is the center of this issue. The Jewish Christians have left Jerusalem and are now intermingling with other towns and other people and are falling into the trap of the Joneses. They are focused on themselves in light of the comparisons around them. The root cause of their issues is that they care too much about themselves—they’ve made themselves the protagonist of their story and see everything as it happens to them. The problem is, from that perspective, one will never be able to resist the devil and/or flee from sin.

Seeking Remission

James continues this line of thinking in v11 with an additional comment about judging others. If we focus on ourselves that will inevitably lead us to the comparison game (keeping up with the Joneses) and judgment towards others. The problem is that we’ve made this all about us. Pride is at the center of all our sin; therefore, humility is the only way to remove the nail. We need to also understand that because pride is the problem, there won’t be a complete cure this side of the pearly gates. We can resist but not absolve. Therefore, our efforts should be ongoing.

Next Steps

Don’t make your life about you, instead remember v10 as the key point to our time today: Humble yourselves before the Lord and He will exalt you. Our problems are rooted inside our pride; humility is the surgery that removes it. Don’t try to be the protagonist of your life. Here are some ways to do that:

1. Make God your top daily priority. When are you most awake and alert? Give Him your best time and focus.
2. Draw a circle around yourself and seek to fix only that which is inside the circle. Don’t focus on others’ issues, only on your own.
3. Ask God what He wants you to do or to give, then follow through in obedience. He will give you fulfilling things for you to do, but don’t seek what you WANT to do, seek what He wants you to do.

John the Baptist said, “He must increase and I must decrease” (John 3:30). The more your focus is on Christ, the less your life will be about you, the more strength you’ll have to resist the devil, and the more useful you’ll be in Kingdom building. It’s God’s story, not yours, and that’s a huge grace He gives.